*sigh*

My father's 33 year old nephew died in sleep last week.
His funeral is Monday night and my father wants me to go.
and honestly?
I'm going to go but I REALLLY don't want to go.
Not because I'm evil or because I feel like being a bitch, but because I have no emotional connection to my father's side of the family. I don't even call my father's brothers my uncles, they're my father's brothers to me.
It's as simple as that.
I know it seems that I'm being incredibly selfish, but how can I be close to people has shown NO interest in me or my sisters?
Ugggg.
I can't complain to my mother about it because she'll be on my father's side.
I can't bitch about it to my sister because *she* already told my dad that she would go.

*sigh*

I'm going to go, not for them, but for my father.

fuck.