Monday, July 12, 2010

Anxiety, sans ropas, and school...Part 1

Living with anxiety/depression hasn't been a walk in the park.

It's always so easy to say be "happy", "perk up", "don't get down", but you can't until you live it, until you have no motivation to do anything. You want so desperately to be happy, you hate worrying all the time, but you can't help it, you fall prey to your emotions.

It's like you don't want to fight anymore.

My dream of becoming a Rad Tech is coming true, I'm not going to lie and say its been a easy road, but after I passed the entrance exam the second time, it's been a breeze....

Until I needed a $4,000 loan to cover the costs.

I've cried about, I've worried about it, and I still haven't wrapped my mind around it.

Every co-signer I've used has been denied and I was forced to ask my grandfather for the money.

I didn't want to do it, but I had no choice.

You have to understand my hesitation, my grandparents are the most selfish people I know and they're all about material things.

Helping their grandkids with ANYTHING is not exactly on top of their to do list.

So I asked him anyway, and now I'm in limbo because he hasn't given me an answer if he's going to give me the money.


Which has made my anxiety worse.

But I'm going to figure it out, I've come this far, I have to see this thru.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

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